Sometimes we want people to know what are we going trough but as this moment, I just want to keep silent and trust God...
All the while I thought I'd never come to the point of having to fear about something. Now, it's here.
I'm worried and scared and I'm resisting this feeling...
I thought yesterday will be a great day for the two of us. Jerry just came home from Baler to attend our scheduled Family Planning seminar -- a requirement for the marriage license (which we already have now) and of course to celebrate his birthday and our 2nd year anniversary...I also told him to better see an ENT Doctor after to examine his toungue. He's suffering for over a month now from a wound which he first thought as "singaw"..We had so many plans yesterday...I'd never thought we won't do as planned.
We went to Clinica Manila at Mega Mall for check up. I waited for him as he is being examined. I thought everything is fine and we can leave early to proceed with our itinerary. But when he came out, he said we'll have to wait because he needs to undergo an operation and BIOPSY. The doctor presumed that his wound was cancerous. I was shocked!
He said that it was a second opinion now since the doctor in Baler held the same... I can see that he is worried and full of fear...This will be the first time na ma-hospital siya. He was in the operating room for an hour. The mass was removed and it will be brought to the Laboratory for examination. The doctor told him that if the result of the biopsy is positive there will be a tendency of another operation removing the cancerous part. Leaving him vertically half toungued...But according to her since she doesn't know the reason of him having that kind of wound, (you know Jerry lives a clean life without any vices)... the result would be more on 60-40 percent. It's a blessing that the doctor was really good and kind. We will know the result after a week...
We then left the hospital. I am trying to cheer him up and make the situation as casual as I could. At that time I know Jerry was feeling so down...after hearing that, who would be happy? But I am not accepting that fact. I refuse to accept that it's positive. I just trust God and with faith I know that we can overcome this... We've been through a lot. And we won. And I see this as another circumstance that we'll win and we'll overcome.
In the car, we're both silent. I feel that he's so depressed. And he's crying. I embraced him and assured him that everything will be alright. I'll be with him.. The devil won't win over us. Our God is greater than he that is in the world. I urged him to be strong. God knows what we're going through and we can always rely on His promises. He is our great healer and He is the God of miracles.
We are praying with faith and hope that everything will be alright...that the result will be negative.
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